If You Love an Author

Look. I’m going to be really frank here, because I think we’ve been friends long enough that I can do that. And if we haven’t, I hope you’ll bear with me for a minute, because this is really important.

If there is an author in your life, and that person happens to be important to you on ANY level, but especially in a familial or close relationship, there are some things you should know.

I’ve avoided this subject for a while, for various reasons, one of them being an inherent belief that I have no business telling someone how to love anyone else. But in a recent moment of clarity, I realized that that is not what I’m about to do. What I’m telling you isn’t how you should love them, but rather, the most important way you ought to be showing that love. Because authors are emotional, sensitive people who pour those emotions and those sensitivities into our work for the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD to read.

What we write is so much more than just words on a page, or a screen, or in a book. These stories often come from the very depth of our souls, distributing pieces of ourselves to everyone who reads them. Luckily, for every slice of ourselves we give away, we grow new, grander ones to share.

Since we are writing to share our deepest, most intimate souls, the hope is we will be joined in this special place by our closest, most beloved people in the world. Our spouses. Our children. Our parents, siblings, extended families, and closest friends.  

Because our stories mean so very much to us, it’s difficult to understand why our loved ones wouldn’t be absolutely dying to read our newest (or oldest) work. But all too often, our loved ones aren’t even interested. And that lack of interest, of support—to us—translates to a lack of personal value.

If you love an author—for whatever reason and in whatever capacity—read their work. I don’t care if you buy it, tweet it, Facebook it, share it, talk about it, or even review it (all of which you should ALSO be doing, but that’s another blog). READ IT. Do not offer explanations or excuses about why you “can’t” or tell them you’ll get to it when you have more time (next year, perhaps?). You might as well be telling them you “can’t” find the time to love them. (And let’s not talk about how short life really is here.)

FACT: Time it takes the average author to write a book = 6 months to one YEAR  .

FACT: Time it takes the average reader to read that same book = 4-6 HOURS (7 if it’s long or you’re a slow reader).

FACT: The average American wastes approximately that much time every week (if not every day) watching TV and/or surfing the internet.

If you love an author, value the time they have spent dedicating themselves to their stories. Read his or her work. Do not make excuses. We are smart people. And you are missing out on the best parts of us.

And that, my dear friends, would be the saddest story of all. 

Inspiration

For the next two weeks, I am taking a short hiatus while we take a little trip and then finish our big move. I am so glad you stopped by to read, so I thought I'd share this lovely shot I took a couple weeks ago as my husband and I headed home from South Padre Island, Texas.

Here's a little writing prompt to go with it:

You have two characters, in a car, on this road. Who are they? Where are they going, and what happened earlier in the day that led them to this place, at this exact time?

Annnnddd....GO!

Holding the Spoon

Occasionally in life, we come to a point where we begin to feel stagnant. When the everyday becomes so routine that it ceases to be a challenge or a learning experience. And like a crime investigation gone cold, sometimes it becomes necessary to find a way to stir things up.

My husband (who is Chief of Police in our town) and his detectives recently did such a thing on a two-year-old homicide case which had almost gone cold. Recent changes in their department (including my husband coming in as chief), particularly the detective division, prompted them to start the investigation from the beginning, look at it with fresh eyes. Then they started all over by calling in a search and rescue team, complete with trained K-9s, to re-canvas the scene of the crime.

I think the same kind of thinking can apply to writing or to other art forms, as well as any aspect of life. Stirring things up is how I got my first book contract. And then again, stirring led me to my agent. Indeed, we stirred our family by moving to Texas a little under two years ago. There is extreme value in shaking things up, breaking patterns, accepting change. Change is growth. And growth is always, always good.

So they stirred this investigation, and while initially, no new evidence surfaced, the presence of the team was enough to start an avalanche of new information that bled with old information, and three weeks later…

This.

An arrest. A strong case. Closure for the victims and their families. A murderer off the streets.

Stirring the cold pot brought out information that led investigators down the right path, just like stirring our family life to come to Texas led our family into some incredible, phenomenal growth. I am still awaiting the verdict on the progress with my career as an author, but big things are coming there too. I can feel it.

I’m already holding the spoon, dipping it in the sauce. Once again, it’s time to give things another little stir.

Everyone Is Angry

I feel a great disturbance in the force over the last few months. Not for any one reason in particular, but maybe for a combination of many. It seems like everywhere I look, every news article or social media feed has become about choosing sides on one issue or another.

Politics. Sports. Industry. Religion. One side must be right while the other side is wrong, and SO MANY people who normally might not speak out are shouting at the top of their lungs, crying foul! Because someone, somewhere, did something or said something that offends a personal sensibility, so we must share our opinions. Let us ALL share our thoughts on Amazon vs Hatchett, or Kate Kelly vs the LDS Church, or whether or not adults should read YA books. Let’s discuss industry jealousy, and politics and politicians, and, oh yes, what about the death penalty? While we’re at it, let’s discuss everything at once because we. Are. Angry.

Everyone is so angry. And eventually, anger becomes bitterness, which turns into hatred. And hatred, no matter how it forms or where it comes from, becomes misery. Wide-spread hatred becomes wide-spread misery.

It feels like everyone in the world is fighting over something. It’s exhausting, really. Because no matter the issue or which side on which you stand, there will never be a point where your view or your take is proven true. It’s an endless circle of discontent.

Granted, it’s not all about being proven right or wrong. In most cases battles are about making change, and I am an advocate for change. Change is good. Always. In most cases, change makes things better, even if it means going through growing pains for a while.

But people, do we really have to be at war with one another? Do we really have to spread venom and hate and anger throughout the world, just because our own emotions are high? Aren’t we, as compassionate, understanding human beings better than animals fighting over a kill?

I think we are. I think we should be. And I think it’s up to us to remember that, and to decide to take a step back, catch a breath, and focus on the good, the positive.

Today, when I was leaving the gas station after my daily Dr. Pepper stop, a gentleman held the door for me. At the grocery store, a little boy smiled shyly and waved. This afternoon, I have had texts from three separate long-distance friends telling me they miss me. My daughter borrowed my car last night, and while she was out, she filled up my gas tank and saved me the trouble of doing it myself.

There are kind gestures, sweet thoughts, beautiful, wonderful things happening all around us, and when we focus on those things rather than the ones that make us angry, I think it’s easier to remember how it feels to be happy. To be individual. To be free.

I vote we stop spreading anger and start spreading love instead. Let’s work on restoring the balance of the force, shall we?

Star Spangled Summer Adventure

I have a certain fascination with American History. Actually, all history, but since I'm American, and I live here, the stories of our colorful past just really interest me. 

A few years ago, I was with my family in Washington D.C., and I had the opportunity to see the flag that flew over Fort McHenry on the night it was bombarded by British war ships during the war of 1812. The same flag which, that very night, inspired Francis Scott Key to pen The Star Spangled Banner. 

During that same trip, I took a walking tour of Fort McHenry, for the first time understanding the full magnitude of what the song means. And since then, our national anthem continues to be a touching reminder to me of how much was sacrificed to build this country. 

So when I heard about the summer adventure challenge being issued by author L.C. Lewis, I HAD to jump on board. Because no matter where you are in America, we are all surrounded by history. 

I'm going to take this challenge, and drag my family along with me--not because of the prizes offered, but because these are the kind of activities that stick with us and shape us into better people. And hey, if we win some prizes along the way, it only makes it that much more fun! 

The details from L.C. Lewis:  

This summer marks the anniversaries of some profound American history. The sesquicentennial of the Civil War continues this summer, and August and September mark the 200th of anniversary of significant historical events from the War of 1812.

August 14th will mark the 200th anniversary of the British burning of America's capital, Washington D.C., including the torching of the White House, known then as The President's House, and the Capitol, which then housed the original Library of Congress. Along with these American architectural treasures, thousands of irreplaceable volumes were lost from our nation's library.

September 12-13 will mark the 200th anniversary of the Battle of Baltimore, the birth of The Star-Spangled Banner, and the moment America began its love affair with the red, white, and blue,.

Sadly, economic issues and budget cuts have forced the cancellation of many public celebrations planned to mark these poignant events.

So families, it’s time to hit the road and create your own Star-Spangled Summer Adventure!

Laurie L.C. Lewis, author of the “Freemen and Dreamers” series, which covers this period of history, and some of her author friends, are hosting this Star-Spangled Summer Celebration to encourage families to rediscover America and her history. You visit local, state, or federal landmarks with your family, and we’ll provide some added incentive.

Here’s how you enter:

          1.       Visit five American historical landmarks, (even your local landmarks count), between Flag Day, June 14th, and Defender’s Day, September 12th.

          2.       Email photos of your family standing in front of a sign or building indicating where you went. Use this email address: starspangledsummeradventure@gmail.com

That’s it!

Additional entries will be awarded for those who promote the SSSA by posting the official badge and link on their blog, and link to it via their Facebook page, or on Twitter.  Just send an email with the corresponding link to starspangledsummeradventure@gmail.com

Additional entries can also be earned by submitting a brief, (250 words or less), testimonial recounting your experience on a leg of your “Star-Spangled Adventure.” These will be posted on my blog over the summer.

One family will be selected to win the prize package on September 13th. Visit the official Star-Spangled Summer Adventure page at  http://www.laurielclewis.com/summer-adventure.htm.

Prizes are still coming in, but the package now includes a Vivitar Digital Video Recorder; a $50 gift card to Bed, Bath, and Beyond; a commemorative set of the Charters of Freedom, suitable for framing; and a family-worthy collection of autographed books from authors in a variety of genres. (From Nichole: Also, this package includes a print first edition copy of DESCENDANT.)

So hit the road, and let us see what great American history you find!

Warmly,

Laurie L. C. Lewis

Nichole Giles

The Difference Between Reputation and Legacy

Remember a few blogs ago when I mentioned that my oldest daughter is graduating this year? Yeah. She really is. (Crazy, right?) Anyway, the other day there was this sort of mock ceremony called a baccalaureate, during which graduating seniors came together, wearing caps and gowns, and listened to an inspirational speaker.

I’m not going to go into major detail about the speech or the activity or whatever. But one thing the speaker said really struck me, so I thought I’d share it here.

He said, “A reputation is built in a day. A legacy is built in a lifetime.” ~Kacy Benson

It struck home for me. Reputation is fleeting. Legacy is forever.

If I teach my children nothing more in this life, I hope it is how little reputation matters when you get to heaven, and how much more important it is to touch the lives of others, in everything we do, and in every way we can.

So tell me. What have you done to touch someone’s life today? 

Outside Appearances: The Importance of a Cover

As I’m working on edits for BIRTHRIGHT, I’ve also been brainstorming cover ideas and thoughts on what I’d like to see on the cover for DESCENDANT’s sequel. Since DESCENDANT was released, I’ve had a few ideas in mind, including links to some photos that sparked my interest.

But this week, I had an epiphany. The photos I’ve had in mind are lovely, and would work just fine. They’d even match DESCENDANT’s cover, which is something I want. They’d even sort of go with the continuation of the story. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that none of the photos have stood out as just right because they all look so similar to the book that’s already been done. No one wants a second book that reads exactly like the first.

BIRTHRIGHT may be a continuation of DESCENDANT, but it’s another story entirely, with a completely different objective and a number of different characters. BIRTHRIGHT deserves a fitting cover, and that cover should convey the mood of the ongoing story. It deserves a cover that makes people think, “Oh hey, that book looks interesting.”

Thus begins my search for a new cover concept idea.

This same philosophy can be applied to people and real life. Keeping up outward appearances tends to be a constant battle. A daily one. And then one day, years down the road, we realize that somewhere along the line we’ve changed. We’ve grown, and evolved, and our stories are so different than they were five, ten, fifteen years ago (or months—whatever). Suddenly, the outside cover we’ve fought so hard to maintain doesn’t really fit anymore. We’ve aged. We’ve experienced life. We’ve adjusted our thoughts and beliefs.

Maybe it’s time for a new cover. (Or new hair color, skin-care regime, workout routine, whatever whatever.)

The point is, sometimes life, like a story, is far more interesting when we are able to let go of previous conceptions and think outside the box.

Out of curiosity, what are some of your very favorite book covers?

The Fine Art of Talking About Nothing

I’ve been thinking this week about small talk, and how many of us spend so much time trying to make it. And I’ve realized something. It’s hard. Trying to have a conversation with someone you don’t know, or who you only know a little, or with whom you have little or nothing in common can be stressful for the most talkative of people.

Most of us kind of suck at it. (I’m one of those people.) In fact, I dare say some of us struggle to converse with people we see every day, or whom we’ve known our whole lives. Sad reality.

But every so often, I come across someone who has perfected the art of talking about nothing. And by nothing, I also mean everything. These are the people who you’ve never met before, or who are maybe only acquaintances or whatever, but no matter when you see them, they always have something to say and—miracle of miracles—what they’re saying is not only interesting, but inspires an intelligent/witty/smart-aleck response from you.

These are the people who seem to be friends with everyone because EVERYONE has had a conversation with them. And not just a conversation, a satisfying conversation, wherein both parties were present and both spoke and responded.

Everyone needs people in our lives to whom we can talk about nothing in particular and know that we are heard. To have those people actually respond and reply and give input. I have a few of these friends, and I treasure them daily for the very vitality and brightness they bring to me. I'm recognizing more and more how very important these seemingly meaningless conversations can be, because nothing is meaningless when it makes someone feel valued.

It’s an art form, really. And one I think I need to study. What kinds of qualities should a talented talk-artist have? (Seriously, I’d like answers to this if you have some!)

New Horizons and Unique Journeys

Since I first started writing—actually no, strike that—since I first decided to write for a career, I’ve paid close attention to the stories of other writers. When I say stories, I mean their personal stories, not the stories publishers are buying. I’ve paid attention to their real-life journeys.

I admit, there have been times when I wondered what my journey will look like, and if I’ll ever be one of those people with a personal story that is unique enough for others to want to hear it, and successful enough to inspire people to keep their chins up and continue moving forward, even when what they desire most is to quit.

I’m grateful for the inspiration others have shared with me, and so I hope to pay it forward.  Also, I can’t lie. I once thought that paying it forward in that way would have to mean I actually reach that level of success in my career.

But as I’ve mentioned before, success doesn’t always look the way we think it should. And every journey is different. My journey—over the last year in particular—has been a roller coaster of ups and downs and sideways and circular motion that I would never have expected. With the recent announcement that my publisher is closing, I realize how distinctly unique my own story is becoming.

Whether I like it or not, I’m getting my wish.

This year, I’ve gone from aspiring author to agented, published author. And now I’m getting my rights back on that published book and there is a strong possibility that going Indie might be my next step. At the same time, I have other submissions out and other things in the works.

My story has officially become unique, and very different from any other I’ve heard. I have a diverse perspective from others, and something new to share and/or contribute to the world of aspiring authors.

I feel like I’m facing a hurricane, but somehow, as I squint into the wind, I can see the calm of a new horizon. And I understand that all of the best things come at a high price, just like the most precious metals are refined in a fire.

So yeah. It’s all good. I’m just building on my awesomely unique story so that someday, when people ask, I’ll be the one inspiring others to build their own story.

And seriously people, you can’t pay for this kind of experience.

What about you? How is your story unique?

Finding the Right Focus

I don’t know about all of you, but my summer has been crazy busy. And being crazy busy puts a damper on progressive creative projects like novels. Or anything for that matter. Yard work, decorating, etc. And if you have a lot of any of those things to work on, the idea of finishing any one thing can be overwhelming.

This summer, we’ve moved. We’re in the process of redoing a yard that was a disaster, also installing a pool. Also, I had two very important writing projects to complete—one to edit, and one to draft and polish. And a book to promote, a blog to keep up. Kids. Husband. Blah blah.

A lot of stuff, no? And there have been times when I’ve been completely overwhelmed, because who in the world could do ALL THE THINGS and actually finish them? No one, that’s who.

So I’ve decided that the best way to finish is to pick ONE thing and focus on it. Start with the most important thing, and focus and work and work and focus until that one thing is done. Then, not only do I have something checked off my to do list, but I feel the satisfaction of having completed an important project. Knowing I’ve done one thing makes the other things feel less overwhelming, because I know I can now pick the next important one and focus on it. And so on.

This is the way I finish things.

What about you? How do you handle overwhelming busyness? 

Fight Like a Turtle

This past weekend my family dragged ourselves out of bed a little more than an hour before dawn (yes, you read that right—BEFORE) and drove to a nearby national park. Rangers were scheduled to release a clutch of recently hatched baby turtles into the sea, and since we’ve missed several other releases, we were determined to make this one—as it is very possibly the last of the year.

Seeing those little guys crawl toward the water was worth getting up for.

 

I’m not going to get into the details of how these particular turtles are an endangered species and how every sighting/nest is supposed to be reported and yadda yadda. Let’s just say that the rangers incubate the eggs (the mothers abandon them) and then, when they hatch, release them in a safe environment to give them the best chance for survival.

So the ranger takes these tiny little turtles, which are smaller than my palm (a kid-sized palm, FYI) and sets them on the sand. Then each little turtle has to crawl a distance of what must seem like miles to them, in order to reach the water that will be their home. They struggle. And they crawl. And crawl and struggle, until finally, a good and powerful wave sweeps up and picks them up off the sand…

Pushing them backward.

So, they craw and struggle some more until the next wave picks them up. Every once in a while, one manages to stay afloat long enough so that the wave carries it out to sea, but most of them end up fighting a battle that basically pushes them back as often as it carries them forward.

Still they fight, and they crawl, and they move on their own with zero help from the hundred or so people watching. And wouldn’t you know it, eventually, every single one of them manages to not only reach the water, but to remain in it.

Because be it instinct or encouragement from peers, those little guys never once thought to give up. They just kept crawling until they found their own wave that would carry them out to where they needed to be.

As I witnessed this miracle of life, the sun came up over the water and turned the water to gold and the sand to burnished copper, leaving me with one parting thought.

Humans can learn a lot from turtles. 

More Summer Happiness

Yes, I'm still out of town. And probably taking a bunch more pictures. What can I say? I love memories like this, and summer is all about making memories. So this week I'm sharing a few more of mine in hopes that you will be inspired to make a few of your own.

This is what happiness is all about.

Happy summer!

The Height of Summer

Here it is, the height of summer, and I am out of town. Again. With all this talk of how to choose our own happiness the last couple of weeks, I think it's appropriate to share some pictures of things that make me happy during the summer months.

What about you? What makes you happy this summer?

Happiness is a Choice

When I was young and we moved around a lot, my emotions were something of a roller coaster. Childhood emotions are generally very up and down anyway, but when your definition of home changes about yearly, even more so, I think.

After a move that had been particularly hard on me, my mother sat me down for a heart-to-heart chat. I was probably eleven or twelve. Maybe thirteen. And I must have been in a serious funk, because even back then it was hard to get me down and keep me there.

But I have never forgotten what my mother said to me that day. She told me that regardless of circumstances, surroundings, or the actions of other people, the only person who had total control of my happiness is ME. Happiness is a choice, and it is up to me to decide to be happy or not.

Since then, I’ve moved a whole bunch more times. Been through relationships and heartache and lots and lots of life. I’ve had my heart broken and rebuilt and remodeled and revised, and lived in several states and gone to lots of schools and experienced both happiness and disappointment. My mother’s words of wisdom have stayed with me through it all.

I choose to be happy.  

I have a family now, and children who are on a roller coaster themselves, and it’s time for me to pass on that same advice.

So here it is:

There are a lot of things and parts of life that are out of your control. Especially as a kid. Things happen, families move, bullies exist and there will always be someone who seems to know just the right thing to say in order to momentarily rip out your heart. You’ll like boys/girls and they might not like you back. Friends will say mean things and hurt your feelings. There will always be someone you miss. Always. There are a lot of reasons why you might choose to be unhappy, and those reasons will never go away. They will likely change, but there will forever be something.

Happiness is a choice. It is up to you to decide to rise above the bad and focus on the good. It’s up to you to take control of your well being. It is up to you to choose to be happy.

I hope I’ve taught you well. That’s all.  

A Wider View

Ever since we moved into this new house, I’ve been on a little bit of a decorating kick. Part of it might be a driving need to make this place feel like home, even though we are far away from everything we know and everyone we love. But I think another part is very much a cycle of style.

I feel myself (and my family) moving away from colors that are easy and “trendy” and moving into ones that are bright and bold. Maybe it’s because we just did a brave, bold thing, and it’s a bit of a hangover from living this new life. I’m not sure. But I find myself gravitating toward color and patterns and other new ideas that I might not have ever considered in the house where everything was normal and comfortable and…the same as it had been since we built that home.

Then the other day, my kids and I cleaned out the garage and finished unpacking a number of our remaining boxes (the ones not in storage) and as we did we found bits and pieces of our past. Things we’ve collected on vacations or that we’ve just simply loved. And we got them out because in our life of uncertainty, we have a strong need to have little reminders of the familiar and the happy things from before.

And in doing so, I realized something. Yes, we’re thinking bold and bright, changing up colors and ideas, but as I lined the tops of our kitchen cabinets with bottles of sand and sea shells we have collected from all over the world, I realized that color aside, the core of our style, the core of our family, is very much the same.

Turns out, my fairy collection goes well with our new beach-esque color scheme, and our art pieces still move us to smiles. So while our style has evolved and cycled in a big way, we are still who we were before. Just maybe more open, more conscious, and with a bigger, wider view of things.

And I think maybe that is exactly the point.

But, um, I’m still looking for a desk for my office, so if you have a great tip on where I should look, I’d love to know.

Staring Down the Crossroads of Uncertainty

Let’s face it. We all feel it. We all have those moments when we are standing at a fork in the road, staring at a number of choices, all of which have pros and cons, and none of which stands out as the absolute right one.

We all have those moments when we have no idea what comes next, and we have to take a leap of faith.

This year, I have come to a number of those crossroads. Honestly, I think this is the year of wide, scary crossroads for me, and the year when I spend more time than ever closing my eyes, holding my nose, and jumping into dark, murky waters or some other strange abyss.

Why can’t the abyss ever be filled with cotton candy or ice cream or sparkly jewelry? *sigh*

This week, I’m staring at another one. A difficult choice, a future-altering thing, a terrifying what-if.  I’m still not sure which road is best, which path will lead me to the place I hope to someday be. And none of the roads is ideal. But regardless, I have to choose one. For this journey, I may need a machete to cut through the weeds, but somehow, I sense that the hardest choice might be the best. Or, well, that’s how it tends to work out for me.

Still. I think I’m ready.

Yeah. I’m getting good at facing the unknown. And hey, if the road I choose is the wrong one, everything is not lost. I will still have an amazing story to tell.

So yeah. Cheer me on, would you? Tell me your amazing story?

Summah! (And other important stuff to do.)

Okay, so I know I’ve been somewhat incognito here and on social networking sites and all that jazz, but our move (from rental to owned-home) is complete (although, unpacking 20 years of crap is going to be a constant work in progress) and I’m diving back into edits/rewrites/drafts and planning to hit my writing hard this summer.

Usually, I don’t work as hard during the summer months because my kids are all over the place and I like to do fun summer things with them. But, um, I feel like I have lost a lot of time this year, which means I will spend the summer catching up.  This means juggling the two is bound to get interesting.

First on the agenda, an updated draft of a book my agent needs ASAP. Second, taking a look at the zero draft of the sequel for DESCENDANT and drafting a workable, editable manuscript. Third—a rewrite (like number 16 or something) of a book I wrote two-ish years ago (maybe three?) that keeps feeling not-quite-ready. And finally, a totally new draft of an idea I started on over a year ago before my life EXPLODED. I’d like to have those first three things I mentioned finished by the end of summer, and hope to be starting on the fourth by September.

Can I do it? That remains to be seen. I may need an incentive of some kind. And some accountability. And some encouragement. I can count on all of you for the latter two, right? And as for incentive, well. Maybe…

A new writing desk? Or a writing patio? Or maybe smaller scale, like shoes. Trips to the beach. Or a night out with friends. Something fun! (Your ideas are welcome and helpful.)

So yeah. Lots of awesome things to keep me excited about working. Now if only I can find a quiet place until my new in-home office is set up (including temporary folding table).

*twiddles thumbs and glances sidelong at more boxes*

Until then, I’d love to hear about what productive/non-productive things you’re planning this summer!

If You’re Going to Do Something, Do it Right

We’re moving this week. I know, I know, we just did this, right? But that's life. I was hoping to be moved in by now, or at least mostly moved in. But the renovations weren’t quite done in time to make our first, or second closing date, so we pushed forward with a third, and have still had to hang out while the last details were finished (minus cleaning, which will probably fall to us now).

*crosses fingers everything is really finished for real*

The problem we continue to run into is that some of the subcontractors have dragged their feet on making deadlines, and then been lazy about the finish work. And, these poor guys because they now have to deal with an annoyed and irritated me, who is very intolerant of lazy/messy finish work.

It’s not that I’m mean or unable to be pleased. It’s just that I have this very firm belief that if you’re going to do something, and if that thing is going to have a deadline, you should do it right and within the time allotted. And if you are not going to finish in time, communicate about why and STILL do it right from start to finish.

Writers, artists, professionals of every variety and choice—we all have projects. Our projects have deadlines, and specifications, and each of us has someone who will hold us accountable (or we should, anyway) for finishing our projects, and finishing them the right way.

I expect this of myself, though I don’t generally get paid for my work immediately after turning it in (or finishing or whatever),  so it’s difficult for me to expect less of people who are immediately getting paid. Because really, I believe we should always, always, always strive to do our BEST WORK, in everything, regardless of circumstances.

So tell me. When is the last time you pushed a deadline, and what did it take to make sure you turned in your best possible work?

Competition or Compassion? It’s Your Choice.

You know those moments when you’re looking at someone and you think, wow, I wish my life was like theirs? Or from the other side, you look at what they’re going through and think, oh, wow, I am so glad that’s not me. And you sort of do this in-mind comparison of lives—not because life is a competition, but because this is how we gain admiration, empathy and compassion. These are moments of growth, moments of truth, I think.

Or conversely, and for reasons I will never understand, there are those who believe life really is a competition, and they set out to win. Except it’s an impossible thing to do, because no hero in the world can win every single battle. And no one person can horde all the money. And no single person will ever own all the recognition. Or beauty. Or the biggest house/fastest car/best book deal/whatever. And the problem with this game they play is that because of all the above mentioned things, those people will never feel like they win at anything. How discouraging! And also, I think, lonely.

The truth: comparing ourselves to others is highly unhealthy. Life does NOT = competition.

Another truth: growing in admiration, empathy and compassion is great as long as we don’t spoil it with the above mentioned mistake.

It is absolutely, totally, and completely possible to be happy for the success of others, exclusive of resentment, anger, or envy. It is. And it is up to us to decide what we do with both our successes and our failures. I’ve had some of both this week. I did not cry hard over the failures, nor did I run out and celebrate the successes, because I’m trying hard to take it all in stride. Right now it would be so easy to look at the journeys of others and wish for things not in my direct path. But I don’t. I won’t.

Because my journey is mine, and mine alone. I am the one who chose to strap on my seat belt and say yes to the ride. And it’s up to me to keep my hands inside the cart and hold on.

When the car stops and I climb out, I truly, genuinely hope that there are people waiting for me on the platform, as well as those in the cars not far behind mine. Because no matter how fast or how slow or which track we choose to take, we are all attempting to end up in the same place.

And I think it would be really awesome if we could all plan one big party in the end. 

When You Reach…

For something you want,

you might actually get it.

For someone you love,

they might hold you.

For someone in need,

you might help them.

For someone you need,

they might help you.

For something more,

it might be enough.

For something less,

it might fall short.

For something different,

different will seek you out.

For things unknown,

you might grab something great.

Or possibly something terrible.

Or a lesson you didn’t know you needed.

Or all of the above.

When you reach high enough,

there will always be something,

or someone to grasp.

But you have to be brave enough

to reach.

What are you reaching for right now? 

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