Oh, Powerful Words

“Words - so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them.”  ~Nathaniel Hawthorne

Such a true statement. Words used for good can move people to action, can change lives, or at the very least, the way we think. Positive words can gift people with confidence and happiness, and most importantly, the right words have the ability to give people hope.

And hope is one of life’s most powerful emotions.

Conversely, words used for evil can cut out hearts, start wars, fights, divorce, create anger, or destroy a person’s self confidence.  

And for some, anger is more powerful than hope.

One of the most important functions of writers is to learn how to pull emotions—like hope and anger, love and hate, happiness and misery—out of our readers. But this skill also tends to be helpful in our everyday lives. For everyone, not just writers.

How have someone else’s words affected you lately? How have your words affected someone else? 

All the Forces of Evil

Okay, so staying on the same subject as Monday’s post, (and because I’m apparently on a fairy tale kick) if love conquers all, is that all it takes to save the world from all the forces of evil?

Well, okay, I suppose you probably need a sword or a bow and quiver of arrows or special powers or something. And a plan. Yes, a plan is a good thing, don’t you think? Because bad guys are devious and smart, so you can’t just expect to waltz into their evil lair and defeat them simply with your presence.

Or can you? Does intimidation work? Maybe sometimes. In real life it does affect some things. But I think probably the best weapon generally ends up being words. Even the good guy with the sharpest sword (or the strongest power or whatever) ends up talking their way into and out of messes on a regular basis. Yes?

And then, in the climactic moment when something has to give, it’s words that ultimately have the most impact on the outcome of the battle.

So, besides being brave, I think in order for the good guy to defeat the evil stepmother-turned-dragon (ala Enchanted) he or she needs to be intelligent and well spoken. They need to have it in them to run toward the scary dragon while everyone else is running away, asking why? Why did this happen? Why to this person or these people and in this situation? And how can I fix it or make it better?

Because only by running toward the forces of evil can the hero realize what needs to be done to save the day. Happens all the time in real life, just not in such an obvious way. Think about it. Is there a situation in your life in which words have won a battle for you? I’d love to hear about it.

They May Be Your Last

I’ve quoted this line here before:

Words - so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them. ~Nathaniel Hawthorne

Recently I’ve been reminded again the potential powerful of our words. Through them, people start wars, bring about peace, heal broken hearts, and also cause them. Unlike physical wounds that can be stitched up and mended, wounds inflicted by words are often left untreated and sore, festering, until relationships between people break apart, unmendable.

On a panel at a conference, Sandra Taylor once said, “Sharp words, if left lying around, can cut even years after they’ve been [said or] written.” At the time, the panel was discussing blogs, but I think this also applies to email and social networking status. Obviously her words had impact on me, because that phrase has stuck in my head ever since.

I’m generally quiet if you meet me in person. I don’t speak up as often as I probably should in classes or social gatherings, because it takes an extra boost of courage for me. But when it comes to blogs or emails, I’m much more confident. More bold. I’ve learned how to string my words together for impact, and am therefore able to voice thoughts I wasn’t able to share only days or hours before, be they excited and happy, or thoughtful, or angry. (Though, truthfully, I try very hard to not voice too many angry words for the reasons mentioned above.)

Recently I’ve been reminded that I’m not the only person for whom this is true.

Writers know how to use words. Or, if we don’t know, we spend lots and lots of time learning. These lessons are meant for good—to share our stories and our knowledge with the rest of the world. But there is a flip side. Words can be used to hurt as well. To wound.

Isn’t it interesting how much bolder we become, how much more free with our words when sending emails or texts, blogs, or even ink-and-paper letters, as opposed to words we would actually share with a person to whom we are standing face-to-face?

I wrote letters (yeah, snail mail) to long distance friends as a child, and then as a teen, in which I would often share things I wouldn’t otherwise have said. As an adult, it’s easier than ever to click send (or publish, or share) in moments of strong emotion or misunderstanding. We can tell the world what we’re feeling or thinking in one click, before we’ve truly thought about the consequences or repercussions.

I’m reminded of a great line in the movie, Ever After. The queen says to the Baroness, “Choose your words wisely, Madam, for they may be your last.”

All I can say to that is amen. Far more than what we’ve done or said, in the end, we will be remembered for our words. What be yours?



**Don’t forget about WriteOnCon, the FREE online writers conference that starts tomorrow. Click here for more deets.

The Story of a Week

I got almost no writing done this week, but I swear I had really good reasons. (I know, excuses, excuses.)

See, it’s like this.

Monday and Tuesday were dedicated to turning this:

Into this.

I didn’t stay to watch them cut it, but I hear it tasted yummy. 

Then, Wednesday, since I was already in cake-making mode, and because she deserved it for always making incredible cakes for all our critique group book launches, I decided to make this

for my good friend Heather Justesen for her recent launch of Rebound. 

We ate it at critique group. It was yum. Chocolate.

Thursday afternoon I spent some fun time with my sister and my two little nieces and nephew—

during which a tragic drowning accident caused my beloved iPhone to die an untimely death.

There is no picture of that. Too graphic for my audience here.

After a night of mourning (aka uncontrollable sobbing) I paid a visit to this place.

They set me up with this. (In white)

I felt much better about life.

Then Saturday, I did this most of the day. 

Along with a few other important things.

Like this. (The query kind.)

Weekly word count total: around 900 words. 

*big sigh*  

I’ll try again next week.

*This week, instead of posting Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I will be posting Tuesday and Thursday, with a possible post on Wednesday to announce a contest winner.  (Big hint!) 

The Value of Words

For some reason, the subject of words and the way we use them has been coming up for me a lot lately. I’m not just talking about in writing, although, our style of word usage in writing has the potential to make or break us, depending on our choices. What about in other things? In conversation, vocal thoughts, arguments, emails, text. Blogs.

Sometimes when I blog I’ll have good friends question my words. Why did you blog about this? What’s going on in your life that would make you think about passion / obsession / emotion (etc)? These questions tell me that I’ve written something thought provoking to the person who is asking. Something that has hit a nerve or sensitive spot in that particular person and makes them go, hey, I can identify with that and now I wonder…

But not only that, when people ask me about particular blogs, I have cause to take a step back and wonder how the world views my words differently from how I mean them to be taken. Sometimes it can be for the good, sometimes for the bad. But the truth is words are rarely taken at face value.

The things we say or write—much the same as in the choices we make—affect other people. I think, for the most part, I try to write things that will help others or at the very least contribute something of value to blog readers everywhere. And then, I try to live by those words. You know, the whole clichéd practice what you preach thing.

In this process, I often end up helping myself as much as anyone. Huh. Imagine that. So, not only have my words become a value to others, but they’re also an asset to me.

What are your thoughts about the value of words?

Don’t forget to check out the contest in which I’m giving away tons of fun prizes.

Also, if you’re looking for where to buy my latest book online, click here.

Tagged--and Things I Love, Day 3: Music and Words

Yeah, I'm pretty sure I mentioned this last year. I love, love, love music. I'm totally the kind of person who hears music in the background pretty much 24 / 7. Even in my dreams. So it goes without saying that I often write to music. I do almost everything to music. Because music is a part of me.

And here's a funny. I don't usually read to music, but when I've been reading a book, then leave and go somewhere (having music playing in the car) I totally attribute certain songs to whatever scene I've just read, or that is on my mind, and the music sticks for me. Ta da! Instant soundtrack creator.

I admit to sometimes having dorkish tendencies. Whatdayado?

Part of what I love about music is the way the songwriters have of telling a story in just a few lines. They're able to do this through word choice. And I love that! I love that people can create such powerful feelings out of something as simple as a few well chosen words. (I also love harmony, melody, and the power of music itself, but am not going to focus on it just now.) There is something so comforting in knowing that words, when used wisely, can have an impact.

So, today, I love music. And I'm running around my house singing--just like a certain friend of mine tends to do when she's feeling especially happy. (You know who you are!)

On that note, my good friend David West totally tagged me last week, and I've been neglecting the game all this time. Sorry, David! So here it is, everything you ever wanted to know about me:


Rules: Answer the following questions with Single Word answers then pass this along to 5 other bloggers. Make sure you let them know about it though.

Your Cell Phone? Awesome
Your Hair? Red
Your Mother? Mom
Your Father? Dad
Your Favorite Food? (Snow)Crab
Your Dream Last Night? secret
Your Favorite Drink? Dr. Pepper
Your Dream/Goal? Bestseller
What Room Are You In? Bedroom
Your Hobby? Traveling
Your Fear? Snakes
Where Do You See Yourself In Six Years? Tropical
Where Were You Last Night? Home
Something That You Aren't? Mean
Muffins? Raspberry
Wish List Item? Furniture
Where Did You Grow Up? Arizona
Last Thing You Did? Laughed
What Are You Wearing? Jammies
Your TV? On
Your Pets? Dogs
Friends? Incredible
Your Life? #amwriting (I’m stealing David’s answer here!)
Your Mood? Smiling
Missing Someone? Always
Vehicle? Mustang
Something You Aren't Wearing? Jewelry
Your Favorite Store? Mall
Your Favorite Color? Rainbow
When Was The Last Time You Laughed? Now
Last Time You Cried? Days
Your Best Friend? Gary
One Place You Go To Over And Over Again? Hearts
Facebook? Yep!
Favorite Place To Eat? Hawaii

I pass this award to:

C.L. Beck because she’s my coauthor and so great to work with.

Rachelle Christensen because she has a book coming out next month and I’m so excited about it.

Christine Bryant because she always has awesome blogging ideas and is such a great friend.

L.T. Elliot because she is my most faithful blog commenter, ever.

Elana Johnson because she is the rockin-est query queen ever.

And one last note to David, who tagged me. I may be nice, but…please don’t make me feed your cats. I’d probably start sneezing like crazy and break out in hives. Okay, that’s a lie. But my son would!

Carefully Sincere Words

By Nichole Giles

There are a lot of words that fall off of people’s tongues with ease. Those who’ve been taught to say things like please and thank you in their youth often say it habitually, without ever needing to be reminded. It’s a good habit, as long as you remember to be sincere when you say it. I know people who have become so accustomed to ending a conversation with phrases like “love ya, bye,” that the words have become more of a closing statement than a declaration of feelings. And consequently, the phrase ends up inadvertently being used at an inappropriate time or to a person for whom the words are awkward.

I’ve noticed that adults have a tendency—just like teenagers—to latch onto certain phrases and keep them, only unlike our younger counterparts, our “sticking” words usually aren’t words like “ish” and “random.” I’ve even heard habitual “sorry’s” from people who have nothing to be sorry about. (Okay, I admit, that would be me. “I’m sorry your sister’s nephew’s cat got stuck in the chimney and ruined your great-grandmother’s carpet…”)

We get used to saying words that sometimes fly out of our mouths without thought, and in the process, the words tend to lose their meanings.

Some of the truest, most observant phrases come from children who haven’t yet had time to gather a vocabulary of sticking words. Sometimes the things our children say can be embarrassing to adults and parents because of the truthfulness behind them. But sometimes the statements made by toddlers unknowingly become an example to the adults who hear them.

Last week I went to visit my sister who lives out of state. I mainly went to spend time with her family. They have a newborn baby and I wanted desperately to meet her (and hold her, and snuggle her.) While I was there, my four-year-old nephew invited one of his little friends over to play. As they played make-believe, one super-hero (dressed-up) boy crashed into one super-girl. They hit heads and as a result, tears were shed.

My nephew, Colby, put his arms around his friend and said, “I’m sorry I hurt you.”

She replied with a sniffle. “I forgive you.”

For them, it was just that simple. And then all was well, and they went back to playing dress-up. As I watched this, I couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel for life, and apology or repentance to be so simple.

Except, what if it is? Or if it isn’t, what if it can be? We may not be able to control how others will react when we repent or forgive, but we can do our best to be sincere and true when we say certain important words like, “I’m sorry,” and “I forgive you.” “You’re welcome,” or “I love you.”

I wonder…if everyone around me were able to think about the words they say as they say them, how would our relationships be strengthened? Would we adults be able to hear or say the words, “I’m sorry,” and then forgive well enough to stand up, put the past behind us, and go back to whatever we were doing before?

I don’t know, but what a wonderful experiment to try. In 2009, I’m resolving to think through my own words, to listen to the ones spoken to me, and to be sincere in my important statements. Maybe if I start with me, the people around me will make that same effort. Or not. But if I hope to make a change, the best place to start is with myself.