There was a time, back when I was not as wise as I am now, when I actually worried about stupid things like appearances. What other people thought of me, why they thought such things, and how those thoughts might come to be.
And it was a crazy, stupid way for me to think because, as we all know, the thought processes of others are completely out of our control. Also, worrying about that was unhealthy and cumbersome to my self confidence and well being.
Since then, I have learned a better way.
Own it.
When you end up taking your kid lunch money still wearing your sweaty gym clothes and no makeup, own it.
When the neighbor comes to your door at 2:00 in the afternoon and you’re still in your pajamas with a fist full of tissues and bed-head—own it.
When you’re on your way to a formal benefit and need to stop by a book launch to support a friend (even though you’re vastly overdressed in a gown) own it.
You are who you are, even when the public perception might be somewhat…less flattering than you’d prefer. I’m not saying you should let yourself go and never try to look and be your best. On the contrary. Looking our best for certain occasions is very important (hence the formal dress in a casual setting).What I’m saying is we’re all human, and occasionally all humans are seen in a light different from what they would normally prefer to be seen. If, by some odd chance, that different light makes people stare a little bit, just smile and wave. It’s all good.
Be glad they didn’t walk in on you naked. Or did they?
Smile and wave, peeps. Just smile and wave.
**Don't forget to enter to win my October Give Back Giveaway. The deadline is extended to Friday at midnight!
Showing posts with label self confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self confidence. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
What Becomes of the Broken Hearted?
On Monday, I promised to tell you what kids need to know after a trusted adult breaks their heart and/or spirit.So here it is, the raw truth (for all kids and adults alike):
It does not matter what church you attend, or how often you go. It does not matter what sport you play, your position, your skill level, your choice of uniform colors. It doesn’t even matter if you play a sport at all. Or if you do art, or dance, or music, or writing. It doesn’t matter if your hair is blonde or brown or black or purple or RAINBOW striped, any more than the color of your skin matters. It doesn’t matter where you live, how large your house, the kind of car your parents drive or if you walk everywhere.
None of these things have anything to do with your value as a very important human being.
You have a purpose, and it is not to be what everyone else in the world thinks you should be, but rather to be YOU. The best you possible. There is always room for improvement. Because no one is, or will ever be perfect. But YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.
That person who let you down? Obviously, they’re not perfect either. And it’s not up to you to make them see the error of their ways (though, your parents might if ever given the chance). No. Your job is to NEVER listen to the voice they’ve installed in your head that makes you look at the ground instead of straight ahead, that makes you back away from a challenge instead of meeting it head on, that makes you feel the need to apologize for NOTHING.
You are good enough. You have the potential to climb mountains, swim oceans, jump chasms, and visit outer space if that’s what you want to do. What you do with your life is not up to them. It’s up to you. And you have the ability to do it, if only you will conquer your fears and try.
And you know what? You may not be perfect, but your hopes, your dreams? They are. And you have every right, every ability, to reach for them.
Never, ever let anyone—no matter who they are—tell you, or make you feel otherwise.
Okay kids, thanks for listening. I’ll jump off my soap box now. Good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.
*Yep, still working toward what all this has to do with writing. Friday, peeps. Friday.
Monday, September 27, 2010
How Many Opinions Are Too Many?
One of my crit partners said something to me the other day that really struck home. We were discussing critiquing and how much our manuscripts tend to change (sometimes very drastically) according to the opinions of our CP’s.
She told of an author she knew who was working on edits with her agent. That author sent her revised manuscript to several CP’s, only to end up revising more before sending the manuscript back to the agent. When it finally arrived in the agent’s inbox, the agent was disappointed because the author had changed so much that the book had lost the all-important voice. And the voice was the thing the agent loved the most about the book.
So I wonder. How many opinions are too many? How many times do you revise before you end up sucking the voice out of your manuscript? Or, if you’re not a writer, how much criticism on your creative endeavors will you accept before you lose the drive to create entirely?
I don’t think there’s a solid answer to this question, but I do think we know when we reach that point. Or at least, we should.
Having critique partners is a blessing, for sure. But as in all things, too much of a good thing can hurt you. It’s a fine line to walk. And I think comes down to us having the courage and confidence to know the difference between comments that make us better, and comments that turn our work into something we never meant for it to be.
Just something to think about.
She told of an author she knew who was working on edits with her agent. That author sent her revised manuscript to several CP’s, only to end up revising more before sending the manuscript back to the agent. When it finally arrived in the agent’s inbox, the agent was disappointed because the author had changed so much that the book had lost the all-important voice. And the voice was the thing the agent loved the most about the book.
So I wonder. How many opinions are too many? How many times do you revise before you end up sucking the voice out of your manuscript? Or, if you’re not a writer, how much criticism on your creative endeavors will you accept before you lose the drive to create entirely?
I don’t think there’s a solid answer to this question, but I do think we know when we reach that point. Or at least, we should.
Having critique partners is a blessing, for sure. But as in all things, too much of a good thing can hurt you. It’s a fine line to walk. And I think comes down to us having the courage and confidence to know the difference between comments that make us better, and comments that turn our work into something we never meant for it to be.
Just something to think about.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Book Review: "Love Your Body" by Brooke Parker, R.D. (And a Contest!)
By Nichole Giles
**Keep reading for contest information!
The blurb:
Are you tired of dieting and feeling unsatisfied with your appearance? In this book, registered dietitian Brooke Parker shares secrets for developing a positive body image and creating your own customized eating plan. You’ll also learn how to replace negative thoughts about yourself with positive, motivating thoughts.
With the tools you master in Love Your Body, the scale, the media, and your “skinny jeans” will no longer have the power to determine your mood, or your life!
My daughters play sports. Both of them are the athletic type—which, for them, translates to fit and healthy. But that doesn’t mean I don’t constantly worry about what they eat and how much. Or how they view their bodies. In my world, eating disorders are far too common, taken much too lightly. And I realize that athletic girls are at just as big a risk as heavier girls who aren’t as active.
Because healthy eating works both ways. Over-eating or under-eating? Both are equally dangerous. Both have something to do with how a person views his or her body.
And let’s face it, body image is an issue for everyone. (Okay, so maybe one person in a million is healthy in this area, but I’ve never personally met that person.) This is why I so enjoyed reading the book, Love Your Body, A Diet-Free Approach to Balanced Eating by Brooke Parker, R.D..
Before we go on, I want to clarify something. This is NOT a diet book. And actually, the subtitle might be confusing, because the book isn’t as much about eating as it is about learning how to think about eating, exercise, and…well, ourselves in a healthy, balanced manner. I don’t have a weight problem, yet as I read this book, I noticed many, many issues that apply to me, my daily habits, and the way I think. Not only that, it has given me a different view of my daughters and how I teach them to love themselves as they are, not as society might try to mold them to be.
In this short, quick read, I found so many valuable little nuggets of information. For instance, in chapter nine, Brooke talks about the expectations we heap on ourselves. She even gives examples of identifying unhealthy expectations and how to change them into healthy ones. Another good example is in chapter sixteen when she talks about destructive thinking styles and how to overcome them.
One of the most important topics? “I don’t have to be beautiful to be loved or liked.” Now, I’m sorry, but to me, that says it all.
To top it all off, she has included charts and worksheets to help you analyze your strengths and weaknesses, and to remind you to have gratitude for your body. Not to mention the suggestions for pampering yourself. Seriously? Who doesn’t need a little pampering now and then.
As I mentioned before, I’m not often a dieter. My goal in general is not to lose weight, but to stay healthy and take care of myself—an area in which I often fall short. I really enjoyed this book, and the thoughts it brought to mind. This is one of those books that everyone should read. And here’s a secret: according to the author of this book, who is a registered dietitian, it’s actually BETTER to eat the foods we love sometimes than to cut them out completely. Chocolate included. Yahoo! Good news for all.
As mentioned in the title of this post, Walnut Springs Press is hosting a contest in which they're giving away five copies of Love Your Body. That's right, FIVE! As I said above, this is a great book to have on hand for yourself and to give away as a gift to someone you love. Here are the important details:
We will be giving away 5 copies of
Love Your Body: A Diet-Free Approach to Balanced Eating as part of the online book book
tour. The contest starts February 17th and will close on March 5th at midnight, MST.
Entering the contest is easy--all you have to do is blog, tweet, follow, or comment and then fill out this little form here.
So exactly how do you blog, tweet, follow, etc. Here's how.
1. Become a follower of our reviewers' blogs. You can follow one of our reviewers or you can follow all of them. Remember that each blog you follow gives you another chance to win, so why wouldn't you choose to follow them all? But what if we are already following a them ask? Well lucky you because you get an entry for that too.
Walnut Springs Press
Brooke Parker RD
Of Writerly Things
Random-ish by Nichole
Queen of the Clan
Rachelle Writes
The Write Blocks
Tangled Words and Dreams
*Tristi Pinkston, LDS Author
Why Not? Because I Said So!
LDS Women's Book Review
Cami's Book
2. Post a comment on the reviews. .
3. Blog about the contest or one of the reviews. Spread the word. Just remember that the blog post either needs to link to the contest or to one of the reviews.
4. Follow us on twitter. Maybe you use twitter, maybe you don't. But if you do, you should follow us.
http://twitter.com/walnutspringspr
http://twitter.com/brookeparkerrd
http://twitter.com/camichecketts
http://twitter.com/valerieipson
http://twitter.com/Rachellewrites
http://twitter.com/LDSWBR
http://twitter.com/nicholegiles
5. Tweet about the contest or one (or all) of the reviews. Yep, 144 characters or less is all it takes to enter.
6. Become a fan ofLove Your Body on facebook. Brooke is constantly updating her fanpage with articles, recipes, and helpful hints.
7. Post about the contest on Facebook.
8. Anything else you can think of that will spread the word. If you mention it on goodreads, shelfari, google buzz, or any other social media site, or make it your status on gmail chat,
MSN or yahoo messenger let us know. We want to reward your creativity with an entry.
Remember that you MUST fill out the nifty little form HERE to be entered.
To buy your copy of Love Your Body, click here.
To learn more about the author, click here.
**The author of this blog received a free copy of this book in order to read and review it. However, because I found it a beneficial aid for a healthy lifestyle, this particular book will be included in a future giveaway so I can spread the wealth of information.
**Keep reading for contest information!
Are you tired of dieting and feeling unsatisfied with your appearance? In this book, registered dietitian Brooke Parker shares secrets for developing a positive body image and creating your own customized eating plan. You’ll also learn how to replace negative thoughts about yourself with positive, motivating thoughts.
With the tools you master in Love Your Body, the scale, the media, and your “skinny jeans” will no longer have the power to determine your mood, or your life!
My daughters play sports. Both of them are the athletic type—which, for them, translates to fit and healthy. But that doesn’t mean I don’t constantly worry about what they eat and how much. Or how they view their bodies. In my world, eating disorders are far too common, taken much too lightly. And I realize that athletic girls are at just as big a risk as heavier girls who aren’t as active.
Because healthy eating works both ways. Over-eating or under-eating? Both are equally dangerous. Both have something to do with how a person views his or her body.
And let’s face it, body image is an issue for everyone. (Okay, so maybe one person in a million is healthy in this area, but I’ve never personally met that person.) This is why I so enjoyed reading the book, Love Your Body, A Diet-Free Approach to Balanced Eating by Brooke Parker, R.D..
Before we go on, I want to clarify something. This is NOT a diet book. And actually, the subtitle might be confusing, because the book isn’t as much about eating as it is about learning how to think about eating, exercise, and…well, ourselves in a healthy, balanced manner. I don’t have a weight problem, yet as I read this book, I noticed many, many issues that apply to me, my daily habits, and the way I think. Not only that, it has given me a different view of my daughters and how I teach them to love themselves as they are, not as society might try to mold them to be.
In this short, quick read, I found so many valuable little nuggets of information. For instance, in chapter nine, Brooke talks about the expectations we heap on ourselves. She even gives examples of identifying unhealthy expectations and how to change them into healthy ones. Another good example is in chapter sixteen when she talks about destructive thinking styles and how to overcome them.
One of the most important topics? “I don’t have to be beautiful to be loved or liked.” Now, I’m sorry, but to me, that says it all.
To top it all off, she has included charts and worksheets to help you analyze your strengths and weaknesses, and to remind you to have gratitude for your body. Not to mention the suggestions for pampering yourself. Seriously? Who doesn’t need a little pampering now and then.
As I mentioned before, I’m not often a dieter. My goal in general is not to lose weight, but to stay healthy and take care of myself—an area in which I often fall short. I really enjoyed this book, and the thoughts it brought to mind. This is one of those books that everyone should read. And here’s a secret: according to the author of this book, who is a registered dietitian, it’s actually BETTER to eat the foods we love sometimes than to cut them out completely. Chocolate included. Yahoo! Good news for all.
As mentioned in the title of this post, Walnut Springs Press is hosting a contest in which they're giving away five copies of Love Your Body. That's right, FIVE! As I said above, this is a great book to have on hand for yourself and to give away as a gift to someone you love. Here are the important details:
We will be giving away 5 copies of
Love Your Body: A Diet-Free Approach to Balanced Eating as part of the online book book
tour. The contest starts February 17th and will close on March 5th at midnight, MST.
Entering the contest is easy--all you have to do is blog, tweet, follow, or comment and then fill out this little form here.
So exactly how do you blog, tweet, follow, etc. Here's how.
1. Become a follower of our reviewers' blogs. You can follow one of our reviewers or you can follow all of them. Remember that each blog you follow gives you another chance to win, so why wouldn't you choose to follow them all? But what if we are already following a them ask? Well lucky you because you get an entry for that too.
Walnut Springs Press
Brooke Parker RD
Of Writerly Things
Random-ish by Nichole
Queen of the Clan
Rachelle Writes
The Write Blocks
Tangled Words and Dreams
*Tristi Pinkston, LDS Author
Why Not? Because I Said So!
LDS Women's Book Review
Cami's Book
2. Post a comment on the reviews. .
3. Blog about the contest or one of the reviews. Spread the word. Just remember that the blog post either needs to link to the contest or to one of the reviews.
4. Follow us on twitter. Maybe you use twitter, maybe you don't. But if you do, you should follow us.
http://twitter.com/walnutspringspr
http://twitter.com/brookeparkerrd
http://twitter.com/camichecketts
http://twitter.com/valerieipson
http://twitter.com/Rachellewrites
http://twitter.com/LDSWBR
http://twitter.com/nicholegiles
5. Tweet about the contest or one (or all) of the reviews. Yep, 144 characters or less is all it takes to enter.
6. Become a fan of
7. Post about the contest on Facebook.
8. Anything else you can think of that will spread the word. If you mention it on goodreads, shelfari, google buzz, or any other social media site, or make it your status on gmail chat,
MSN or yahoo messenger let us know. We want to reward your creativity with an entry.
Remember that you MUST fill out the nifty little form HERE to be entered.
To buy your copy of Love Your Body, click here.
To learn more about the author, click here.
**The author of this blog received a free copy of this book in order to read and review it. However, because I found it a beneficial aid for a healthy lifestyle, this particular book will be included in a future giveaway so I can spread the wealth of information.
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