Wednesday, July 18, 2012

What Would You Give Up?

Last week I had some stress. I’m not going to go into details, but let’s just say that someone I trusted—someone I loved—chose to sacrifice their relationship with me in order to (they hoped) get ahead in a business venture. Unfortunately for them, and me as well, the sacrifice probably won’t get them very far. If anywhere.

But the relationship will never be the same, if it is ever mended.

The whole situation has made me pause and think. I know that desperate people often do desperate things, but when it comes right down to it, what would I be willing to sacrifice in order to succeed?

The truth is I’m not sure what I would sacrifice. It would totally depend on the situation. However, I know for sure a few things I would NEVER sacrifice.

1. People. No matter what happens, how badly I want something, how desperate I am to get it, people will always be more important than things, than money, than my personal success. Always.

2. Friendship. Because it’s more important than any career will ever be.

3. Personal beliefs. Everyone has lines they refuse to cross. I have mine too. They’re probably different than those belonging to other people, and that’s okay. That’s what makes us unique.

4. Things that are important to my immediate family. For instance, last spring I skipped out of a semi-formal awards dinner (which was part of a big local writer’s conference) to go home and help get my daughter ready for prom. It’s about priorities.

5. My sense of self. If becoming a well-known national author means I have to look, act, or pretend to be someone other than who I really am, I’m out. As it happens, I like me. And other than firming up, trimming down, and smoothing out a few troublesome areas, I have no plans to change who I am or what I stand for.

What about you? What would you NEVER sacrifice?


T.J. said...

I was sitting here thinking "What COULD I give up?"

The main thing I came up with was time. Time is an important factor of life. Do I sleep or do I write? Do I play Monopoly Jr with the kids or do I write? Time is one of the most valuable things in the world, it is also one of the greatest enemies anyone can deal with.

So as much as I would not sacrifice, balancing time is where I have to remind myself of what I am sacrificing to spend the time required for whatever task I have at hand.

There's so randomness for you this morning.

Angie said...

That's too bad about your friend. :( I will not sacrifice my relationships, including my relationship with God, or my health. I think everything else is up for grabs. Great question.

LM Preston said...

Well life does have a way of revealing the true nature of men/woman. But for me, I feel that what's meant for me is for me and that I don't have to do anything I couldn't live with myself for to get ahead, to get paid, to get famous or anything. Because the truth is, I'm already rich because I'm loved and know how to depend on my attitude about the glass being half full to keep me happy.

Randy said...

Back in 95' I was in business with my two best friends. It did not end well and for awhile I lost both of my friends. Fortunately, my story has a happy ending in that I have since reconciled my differences with both of them and we are again good friends. (And in business together.)

What the three of us learned from the experience is that money, popularity, and fame are poor compensation for the loss of a great friend. Please, consider that as you go forward during the next couple of weeks.

Nichole Giles said...

TJ, yes, time is definitely hard to give up, isn't it? But that is one area where I think we have to find balance. Because everything worth having requires a certain amount of time.

Angie, yes, spiritual relationships and health--definitely important. I totally agree.

LM, good for you that you're not willing to give up anything. That is some serious self confidence, and I'm glad you feel that way.

Randy, thanks for sharing your story. I agree that relationships are important. But I also think honesty is equally important.

Thanks everyone, for sharing your stories and your thoughts.

L.T. Elliot said...

I'm sorry but What. The. HELL? Who does that? I mean, I know it happens but still! Who freaking does that? You're right. People ARE more important. Relationships are sacred and if in the end, my relationship with someone is disposable enough to treat so abominably, they didn't deserve one with me anyway. You're a friend worth having, Nichole. You're a friend I'd NEVER toss aside like that. They're missing out big time because knowing you like I do, your loyalty is worth clinging to. Few people in the world are as inherently GOOD as you.