Monday, February 14, 2011

Blogfest: Love at First Sight...or Not So Much.

Okay, I admit I'm not big on blog fests of this sort. I'm not all that comfortable posting portions of my works-in-progress online. Especially ones I'm currently querying.However, in honor of Valentines Day, and because I've had a couple requests for this particular scene, I'm going to make an exception. 

The following excerpt is from a finished manuscript, currently titled GIFTED. The characters, Kye and Abby, are on a bus, on a trip with a large group of kids from school.They don't know each other well, but are extremely comfortable with each other--a phenomenon which is explained later in the story. (Sorry, kids. You only get 450 words!)Abby has fallen asleep on Kye.

My dreams are riddled with Kye and Eric fighting, Kye and me kissing, more kissing, and various other activities that make my heart race and my blood run hot. The strangest part is that it all feels more like distant memories than dreams. I have mixed senses of peace and dread, happiness, and deep, profound sorrow. Then an awful laugh breaks through, rough and mean. Frightening.


When I jerk awake, Kye rubs my arm and smoothes my hair. “Shhh. Just a dream.”


Heat creeps up my cheeks as I lift my head to meet his gaze. Something in his eyes makes me long to stay right here, wrapped in his arms and staring into the endless pools of blue, for the rest of forever.


I tear my eyes away, feeling silly, and glance at his watch. After only an hour, my crush has developed into something far more dangerous. The full moon bounces above the mountains like a glowing eye, a bright ball in the darkening sky, gilding the edges of the distant cliffs. Kye traces circles up and down my arm, and my chest tightens when his hand slides under my chin and tips it up.


Our eyes meet again, and a spark of recognition passes between us, something undeniably strong, and just as unexplainable, and I can’t look away. Can’t break the spell. Conversations buzz around us, but we float in our own little bubble, focused and unmoving for eons of time. His hand moves down my arm until his fingers lace with mine.


He shifts, pulls me closer. His heart beats a quick, irregular thrum under my free hand. “I can feel your heart,” I whisper.


He breathes deep. “Did you feel it skip a beat just now?”


“Your heart didn’t skip.” I try to smile, lighten the mood. Something is happening and I don’t understand what, exactly. “It sped up, but it didn’t skip.”


His expression is serious. “It practically stopped. So did yours, I felt it.” He closes the distance between our faces, and his lips touch mine, soft, experimental. 

This time our hearts stutter together. Kye smiles against my lips, because he knows I felt it too. He takes a breath and leans in again, this time harder, more demanding. We melt together like chocolate and caramel. My mind screams for me to stop, that it’s too soon for this. I don’t know him, not really. But my heart has a different idea, and so do my lips.


When we break apart, I’m trembling. Time feels quick, racing. I have a surge of panic that makes me keep my eyes on him, like I only have so much time to drink him in before he leaves me forever. The idea becomes unbearable, and I catch myself clutching his arms around me.


“You okay?” His voice is breathless.


“Okay?” I shake my head. I’ve completely lost my mind.

To read more entries from the Love at First Sight...Or Not So Much blogfest, check out the full list here.


Have a fab Valentines Day!

23 comments:

C. K. Bryant said...

Aw! I've always loved this scene. Makes me want to read the whole book again. Hope you get that agent soon, so I can get my autographed copy of the printed version.

Shari said...

That's a great scene! Actually, great doesn't really do it justice. Thanks for sharing it.

Maria Hoagland said...

How sweet! Thanks for sharing.

Gail said...

You need to get published so I can read the whole thing. This is not a fair blog fest. Getting people hooked and then dropping them without some much as a this is what happens next. I love it!

Jordan McCollum said...

Nichole, this is seriously fantastic. I hope this gets snatched up VERY soon!

Thanks for participating! (And thanks for correcting the link!)

Krista said...

Whew! Great scene, Nicole!

Joyce DiPastena said...

Awesome, awesome, Nichole! I was completely entranced with this scene! Good luck with getting it published. It sounds like a winner!

careann said...

Hi, Nicole. Nice story. Love the urgency of Abby's growing discovery. They've created their own little world on that bus.

Carol Garvin

Angie said...

Very nice! Definitely gets the heart pumping. Good luck with the querying!

RaShelle said...

Very sweet, Nichole. Intimate. ;D

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

way way cool! makes me want to know what kind of magical element is going on here!

franklycreative said...

Nice scene. Thanks for sharing. Especially when you are so busy.

Canda said...

Whew! Great first kiss. Hope it's published soon.

Rachel Rossano said...

Beautiful! A wowser of a first kiss. :)

Rebecca said...

Nichole, this is seriously amazing. I want to read more SO BADLY, and I'm kinda picky when it comes to what I want to read!

Bethany Mason said...

The writing was so beautiful and moving that I am now close to screaming at the screen for not continuing. Seriously, I loved this and hope it is published as I HAVE TO READ IT.

Rebecca Shelley said...

Terrific scene. Perfect for Vanlentine's Day.

Debbie Davis said...

Nicole! I love that scene sooo sooo much! You are such an incredible writer, I am so glad you shared it with us, and now I can learn from you and be a better writer. You made my mind sizzle and catch on fire, and I know my heart skipped a beat!

Heather Justesen said...

I still love this scene--how could anyone not?

Nichole Giles said...

Thanks everyone. You all make me blush. Working on that published thing, though.

Until then, sorry you're in suspense. =) Name of the game, I guess.

Thanks for stopping by.

Marsha Ward said...

Such sweet anxiety! Thanks, Nichole.

Robbin said...

Wow, that was a great Valentine's read. Very powerful.
Thanks for sharing

kbrebes said...

I'm a little late coming to the party, but I loved it!!!